Imagine going to a restaurant and looking over the menu. Just as you are thinking of placing your order, the server says, “The chef will decide what you will be having for your meal.” For most of us, this would not be acceptable; and yet, this is what can happen if you litigate your divorce and leave it to a judge to decide your future.
Let’s go back into the same restaurant, where the menu choices don’t fit your dietary restrictions or preferences. You know that the kitchen has the ingredients to make a dish for you that is not on the menu. You think, if they can make this for you, it would be a wonderful meal.
This has happened to me more than a few times, and quite often, the chef is happy to accommodate a special request. These are the restaurants where I’m likely to return. Why? Because I appreciate their willingness to work with me in being creative to prepare the meal that will be most satisfying.
Unlike the traditional litigation process, divorce mediation offers the same opportunity for creativity. Like a restaurant server, I work with clients who want to explore the options that others have chosen in other cases. Sometimes you will determine that one of those choices will work best for you. However, when you and your spouse are exploring a different way to decide a particular issue through the mediation process, I support your desire for creativity. After all, this is about what will work best for your future, and I believe that you deserve to control that outcome on your own terms.
As you approach a difficult decision involving the end of your marriage, give yourself (and your soon to be ex) the freedom to brainstorm any and all possibilities.
As you approach a difficult decision involving the end of your marriage, give yourself (and your soon-to-be ex) the freedom to brainstorm any and all possibilities. Then we can evaluate objectively the advantages and disadvantages of each option and ask as many questions as needed to fully understand what each would entail—whether in relation to parenting, finances or logistics.
Using mediation to foster creativity is how you can improve the chances of getting the result that will work best for both of you and your futures.